Yesterday was great!
I had some great lectures, got some extremely valuable feedback on the piece I'm composing for Piano & Baritone voice, and got to hear where my fellow composers are at with their work. It was an extremely valuable day in every sense and I arrived home feeling tired but also really positive about my work, the pieces I'm currently working on and just composing in general. But (and that's a rather large BUT), there are times when I can go from feeling ecstatic, passionate and totally enthused in everything about my work,
to then all of a sudden, be on the opposite end, stuck in a rut and
feeling that my work isn't what I want it to be, or that the way I go
about making my work, is rubbish (and in my head that's validated because I
think my work sounds bad, therefore, my process MUST be flawed). It was that unfortunate position that I found myself in over the past week or so, completely unable to produce a single note I was happy with, and although I woke up in the mornings feeling the need to compose (like I normally do), that feeling soon evaporated and was replaced with pure frustration.
Its then very surprising how sharing ideas with my peers and getting constructive feedback from both them and your lecturers can suddenly impact on my desire to actually get working on my pieces. Sometimes the feedback I hear is only confirming what I feel already, and that can make it easier to either continue on the same path (confident that I'm not heading toward a dead end) OR makes it easier for me to make changes. Other times the feedback is not what I expected, and that then, opens up a whole new approach to my work (or a specific piece) that maybe I'd never considered, and that can be very exciting to know that there may be other things, even in my OWN work, that I've yet to discover.
In my excitement, I'm off to play a Piano.
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